Reasons to Skip a Wedding Party
I wrote about the benefits of having a mixed-gender wedding party, but would you consider going without a wedding party altogether for your wedding? This is something I wish I would have forgone with my own wedding. Initially, the idea of not having a wedding party can feel so uncomfortable! Isn't a beautiful and large wedding party part of the ideal wedding experience?!
Let's talk about some important reasons why forgoing a wedding party might be a good decision for you and your partner. First, I want to tell a quick personal story about my experience with a poorly chosen wedding party. My husband's best friend, his woman of honor, walked out of our wedding without saying goodbye. They did not speak after that. Our wedding was the last time he talked to his best friend, and it was on bad terms. Obviously, she is in most of our wedding photos, and it sucks to know she truly wasn't there to support us as a couple.
I tell this story to remind you that people you trust implicitly can still betray you with zero notice. I hate to be so negative, but it is important to consider when navigating choices revolving around your wedding party.
Let's look at a few reasons to skip a wedding party.
ELOPEMENT OR MICRO WEDDING
Suppose you're having an intimate wedding, such as an elopement or micro wedding. In that case, it makes complete sense to forgo the wedding party. You're choosing to focus on your relationship rather than a large party. Planning is a bit easier, and there are fewer responsibilities to delegate.
The Daydreamer Diaries | Kaitlyn Brown
AVOIDING DRAMA
Some people come from massive families and have large friend groups. Skipping a wedding party to avoid upsetting close friends and family is a valid reason to skip one altogether. Without labels, you can still plan fun parties and celebrations with your loved ones. Avoiding conflict surrounding a day that is supposed to be all about you is very valid. Ultimately, your peace matters more than anyone else's about your wedding.
DISTANCE
If you're planning a wedding with long distances between you and your loved ones, it is a valid reason to skip a wedding party. Traditionally, your wedding party is responsible for hosting your pre-wedding celebrations, which may be much more complicated if they're far away. It takes away the disappointment of not having everyone close together to do all of the fun celebrations by choosing to have a more intimate focus on your relationship.
OPINIONS
Another valid reason to skip a wedding party is that everyone is a lot more than you want to deal with. Suppose you have a high-conflict family or highly opinionated friends. In that case, it can add much more stress to your wedding planning experience. By choosing not to have a wedding party, you have more time and mental space to focus on what you and your partner want without unwanted comments and opinions. As I have stated before, your peace matters most. I wish more brides and people getting married stayed true to what brought them the most happiness rather than outside acceptance.
GETTING READY
I wrote a great post about why you might choose to get ready with your spouse on your wedding day. With a traditional wedding party, getting ready with your spouse is more difficult because you might feel some FOMO about what's happening with your people. You might not want to coordinate multiple getting-ready spaces. If you choose not to have a wedding party, you can get ready with your partner with complete peace. You can still delegate tasks to trusted family and friends, but you have peace on your wedding day.
SAVING MONEY
Wedding parties are expensive for everyone. It's expensive for you and even more expensive for the wedding party members. Cutting the wedding party altogether is entirely valid to help save money. You have so many opportunities to make your wedding more cost-effective without a wedding party, like being able to cut the rehearsal dinner. If a wedding is small, there isn't a need to get everyone together to coordinate walking plans. You don't have to worry about anyone feeling pressure to spend too much money on various parties, apparel, and travel arrangements.
The Daydreamer Diaries | Kaitlyn Brown
If you do decide not to have a wedding party, don't forget that you can still give small gifts to the people who mean the most to you. There are no rules for how you label (or don't!) individuals for your wedding. Tasks can still be delegated, and parties can still be thrown while being inclusive to all your loved ones. You're allowed to break every tradition that doesn't serve you and make your wedding day the best for you. Looking back at my own wedding, I tried so hard to make a wedding happen traditionally when my circumstances were not healthy enough for that.
Until Next Time,