How to Keep Your Peace as a Couple While Wedding Planning
If you haven’t, check out our post about how to keep your peace while wedding planning (Click here to check it out!). As I was writing that article, I wanted to touch on the importance of maintaining peace as a couple. Planning a wedding has the potential to bring out some rough feelings between couples, and it’s important to remember to respect your significant other. This day is theirs, too, and both people deserve to feel loved and valued.
First, consider why couples may find the engagement period more intense than dating. You’re combining your finances and problem-solving skills to execute a party. You are navigating how to delegate tasks and set firmer boundaries than you may have encountered previously. It is stressful, and stress can wreak havoc on a person’s ability to remain peaceful at the moment. There will be rough moments, but those can most definitely be used to grow as a couple and as individual people.
The Daydreamer Diaries | Katie Brown
Set Expectations Early On
Every couple has different expectations for the level of involvement of each individual. Before getting into heavy planning:
Have thorough conversations about how involved you expect the other person to be.
Keep tasks organized and use a system that works best for you.
Remember to check in often to ensure both of you feel heard if tasks need to be re-delegated.
Clear communication helps you keep your peace as a couple as you plan your wedding.
Talk about finances early
Remember, in the other article about keeping your peace; we touched on managing expectations. This goes hand in hand with your partner talking about finances early on. This conversation should be the foundation of all wedding planning decisions so that you create a day within your means. If you have family helping, make sure to discuss and set those boundaries as well. The earlier you discuss finances in wedding planning, the easier it will be to keep peace throughout the planning process.
Know how and when to compromise
As much as a wedding is about the bride, your partner matters too. If an element of color choice resonates more with your partner, do your best to let go of control of your vision and adapt a version that showcases what is important to both of you as a couple. This is the time to remember that your wedding is about both of you. It goes a long way to incorporate unique ideas and details for your partner. There is no better way to keep the peace than actively being involved in the details together.
The Daydreamer Diaries | Katie Brown
Share Tasks
Both of you need to remember that this celebration is for both of you. You shouldn’t take on one hundred percent of the mental and physical workload. Plan a date to stamp envelopes together (or outsource it!) or have your partner be in charge of booking a portion of the vendors. Both of you should have an active part in making your wedding come to life. Even if you have a hands-off partner, it’s still important to make sure an effort is being made to include them. This helps keep the peace as a couple by giving an active role in taking things off your plate.
Connect
Remember to date your significant other. Wedding planning is such a short season, and you have many, many years together to come. Remember why you chose your significant other when the stress becomes a lot. Make each other a priority. Take a step back and remember what truly matters. Things will inevitably go awry on your wedding day, but remember, it is one moment in the grand scheme of things. You and your partner chose each other for more significant reasons than your wedding planning abilities. Support each other, kiss each other often, and do not neglect your relationship in a season of stress. The best way to keep the peace as a couple is to remain united against all the hard things that come up during wedding planning.
The Daydreamer Diaries |
Ultimately, I encourage you to remember that both of you are human. Understand that you will have individual responses to the stress, obligations, and planning that come with a wedding. Learn to let go of mistakes, forgive for an unmet expectation, and extend grace as you learn more about your person! Your mental health is a priority, and your relationship should be a safe space for both of you to express your needs to each other.
With that in mind, I wish you a happy wedding planning season! I invite you to explore the rest of our blog posts about nontraditional rings, types of weddings, and detailed ideas that can make your wedding unique for you!
Until Next Time,